mental health days

As someone in healthcare and working in these trying times, I want to stress more than ever that we all need your prayers for strength, not only physical but mentally. The support we got when Covid-19 first started was unbelievable. But now that we are seeing a resurgence of it, we are not seeing that support. It feels like this time around, the physical and mental stress seems different and it's more this time around.  I am not going to preach about the vaccine or about wearing a mask. I just want to get out there that the nurses and pca's that I work with are working longer hours, with more critical patients and they are feeling it. 

I work with some great people that are doing what they can to provide the best care to our patients. But the stress of these trying times is starting to wear on them as well as me.

You see, as healthcare workers, we are the caregiver, counselor, hugger, hand holder, and sometimes family to our patients as well as our co-workers.  A lot of the nurses I work with have never experienced anything like this and it is so hard to process what is happening and how to comfort our patient and families and have it not affect us emotionally.

I am one of those type of people, as I am sure a lot of you are out there, that wants to appear to have it all together. But if you really think about it, none of us really do. We need each other to get through our days, even if it is a good one. And it isn't failing if you need to ask for help. I have seen so many co-workers shed tears because of their patients condition.  And it isn't because they are weak, but that they care so much and there is nothing we can do.  It is a feeling of helplessness that when you do all that is in your power and nothing changes. Your patient is still sick, or even worse, they die.

It is not shameful or a sign of weakness to seek help. I tell this to my co-workers and encourage them to seek the help of counselors or doctors. But to be honest, as one who likes to seem that I have it all together, I don't.  It's ok to not be ok. But to recognize when you need help is another story. I feel embarrassed, or weak when I admit I need help. But to take that step shows strength. 

I hope that if you are feeling the stress of this world, you will seek help. It doesn't have to be in healthcare. It can be the loss of something, a loved one, job or it could just be the stress of raising a family. There is so many things out there and not one tops the other.  And if you see someone that seems to have it all together, just think, they may not but is not sure who to go to get help. 

I have sought the help of others and it was a hard step to take, but a needed one.  Just take that step. The first one is always the hardest.

John 16:33 "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

Joshua 1:9 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go."

Love to all,

overwhelmed

 Still feeling like you can't manage it? I have recently felt so overwhelmed that I didn't think I was going to be able to breathe.  So many things in life being thrown my way. My last post was talking about handling life and that was a month and half ago! I got through that and still having more things thrown at me. 

~Son away at school in Florida 

~Daughter trying to find a job, but the job market sucks and trying to encourage her in this hunt

~house renovation still going on and wishing it would be over!

~work: flipping to day and night shift because of staffing needs and trying to do my job with it

.....and I can go on and on. But I am not going to whine. God made me strong. And when I feel weak, I know where to turn. Sometimes the tears come, just to get some relief. I can remember when my daughter would cry, for no reason. I would ask her, why are you crying and she would say, "I don't know". I totally understand that now. But sometimes this release helps me get through these times. Some people scream, run, exercise, eat.....I cry.

I also make pickles! I love doing this. It is a lot to do and pretty much takes about half of my day off, but I enjoy it. It is something that I do good and I love to eat what I can make. 

When you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, know God is still using you. 

" My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Love to all, 

Can you handle it?

 This week has been intense. I mean, intense, in all aspects of life. Work, family, personal growth. Sometimes it is hard to give to others when I feel I don't have anymore to give.

Sometimes it is hard to contain it and the tears flow.  Sometimes while driving, I just need to let out frustration and no one hears me.  I will yell and scream just to release that tension. I bet those driving by me think I am crazy or have lost my mind!  Or I will blast my music so loud to drown out the thoughts and just concentrate on the words of the songs. So glad no one hears me singing, I am not that good!

Have you felt this way? Felt like you were not going to be able to handle what is thrown your way?

I am still here and still handling the curve balls thrown at me. Is it hard? YES! Very hard. I know it will be. But I know I can do this, continue to be strong, give a smile, give more of me to others who may not be able to handle the stress of life.  Pray with them, hug them or just sit and listen.

We don't always get to choose our battles but we choose to stand. We choose to have victories in our stand. Don't be the victim of your circumstances. Choose to have courage to extinguish your worry and fear. Worry will stop you from living, from moving forward.  I don't want to dwell on what is hard and stressful. I want to enjoy my life and be full of happy and joy.

And guess what. The evil one knows what your worries, fears and anxieties are. And he will use that against you to keep you in this stressful state. He will keep reminding these to you to keep you down. 

We are bigger than this. Don't give in. Be courageous. Even when you are tired, stressed, feeling like you have no more to give.

Like I said, this week has been intense for me. But I choose to not let the devil keep reminding me, refuse to let him keep making me feel like it is my fault, refuse to let him make me feel I have no way out. 

I am not alone, I must choose to be victorious and I can only do this with christ with me.

Joshua 1:9 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

Love to all,

I'm OK

 How many times have you said that? I'm OK.  Were you really ok? I sometimes say I'm ok when really, deep down, I am not as ok as I make it out to be. It is sometimes easy to put that fake smile on and say I'm ok just so you don't have to talk about what is bothering you or hurting you.  But, what if. What if you just spoke the words, I am not ok, and what is hurting you to that one person you trust. Think of how much it would help you through those difficult times. 

I am learning this. Not everyone wants to hear your problems and you shouldn't tell everyone your problems either! But those that really care about you will want to listen and help you. I am learning this. It is a slow and hard process for me because I want to keep everything bottled up. 

Jesus is the one that can help you too. Yes, I know, you can't feel or see him in person, but you can feel his presence around you. You need to have faith. Faith that He will provide for you. He will provide a way out of a difficult circumstance, provide a person to come into your life or cross your path at just the right moment. He will provide you comfort and a peace you just can't understand.

So call on him. Ask him to give you his smile, his peace, his comfort and he will give it to you! Today, I have his smile, not a fake one, but one that He has placed on me because I know I am not alone.

Philippians 4:7- And the peace of God,which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

1 Corinthians 10:13- No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out.

Love to all,

Grief

 Grief. It happens. Life happens. And how you handle it is different from everyone else. 

I have had a lot going on these last few weeks personally. 

* My dad in the hospital and not sure what was going on with him and what would happen to him.

* June 1 was the 9 year anniversary from my breast cancer diagnosis, which brings so many feelings and memories from that phone call.

* A great man from my church passed away, in the hospital I work in, which was hard seeing him sick, and his family in grief.

* taking my son to Florida to find an apt for him to move, dealing with my feelings about him moving 3 states away, and trying to learn to let go and grow up

* My mother in law going to be with Jesus this week.

All of these events have caused me to withdraw and my stress level increased.  I am having to concentrate on managing stress through meditation, prayer and being with my family.

I am doing ok, so no need to worry. I am planning my mission trip and that is keeping me busy.  Life is hard and when you start thinking about death and family moving away, it makes it harder. 

I don't want to think about losing any of my family, but I do know my God will be with me, never leave me. I am never alone. So I will be able to manage my son moving, it may take a little time, a few tears, but I will be ok.

In case you are wondering, my dad is doing great! He got a pacemaker and that has been a blessing. It is like seeing a new person. His health is so much better, and he is able to do so much more. 

So if you are going through a difficult time, feel like there is no end to trouble times or just feeling down, know that God is with you. You just need to call out to Him. He will answer.

Deuteronomy 31:6 ESV 

"Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”

Love to all,